Somebody Slap Me With A Fresh-Fried Fish

The other day, I placed my finger on something. Something that had been bothering me. Bothering me so much so that I set on a quest- an oily quest, much akin to that of Sinbad out in the sea.

You see, there is this kind of enchanted vegetable oil that is full of pheromones. Don’t take it for granted, because it can also induce hallucinations. At first, upon opening the kibuyu, one’s senses become heightened. Vegetables become brighter and multicolored. You can hear the flame on the gas cooker hiss. And because it is highly cholesterol free, the sizzling of fried fish and prawns actually sounds less fattening and less heart ‘attacky.’

Then your eyes dilate. Continue reading